North Dakota Uses UAV To Make Arrest (Limerick Tuesday)

http://www.usnews.com/news/articles/2012/04/09/first-man-arrested-with-drone-evidence-vows-to-fight-case?google_editors_picks=true

So crazy guy A, let's call him Bob, decides that possession literally is 9/10ths of the law and the other 1/10th of the law is having a rifle. Seems legit right? Well some cows wandered on to Bob's property and when the owners asked for them back, he checked his math and said no. The cops were called and when they showed up Bob once again checked his math and with two of his family members (aren't they are always family members?) chased away the police with their 1/10th of the law. (That would be the rifles for the math impaired.)

The police then got a search warrant, had Homeland Security send up a drone to take a look-see at the ranch, and then had SWAT raid the ranch to arrest the crazy fuckers alleged, um, crazy fuckers.

Bob is now crying that a drone was used and claiming it is illegal and the libtard brigade is going to be all over this.

Bob, let me point you towards the bold font just above here. See that last word? Check and mate fuckface.

That said, I swear to FSM that if this guy doesn't do hard time, I'm going to start building the clock tower. Common sense has long since left the legal realm in this country and I wouldn't be surprised if this doucheknuckle walks.

Annnnnd I just recalled that it is Tuesday. My apologies.

This crazy guy tried to steal a cow,
For that I raise my eyebrow,
We then used a drone,
To look at his home,
An airstrike I would've allowed.

Teenage Me Is Crying Tuesday Limerick

There once was a boy in Kentucky,
Who was extremely god damn lucky,
He's not Derek Jeter,
Yet an NFL cheerleader,
He allegedly made with the "fucky."



http://abcnews.go.com/US/kentucky-teacher-ben-gals-cheerleader-indicted-alleged-affair/story?id=16039069#.T3ocDqvOxrU

(Seriously. Can I go back to high school???)

Hunger Games Limerick

So someone named "Rue" is black,
Apparently this is way off track,
It says in the book,
Her skin: dark brown it does look,
So wait... what in the fricking frack?

Artificial Heart Limerick

There once was a story of a heart,
It was artificial and wouldn't fall apart,
Isn't it neat?
You'll have no heartbeat,
Yet life in you it will impart.

http://www.popsci.com/science/article/2012-02/no-pulse-how-doctors-reinvented-human-heart?page=all

[Very interesting read if you like technology and/or cardiac medicine!]

Super Tuesday Limerick Twofer

"Here we are in the land of the free,
Set to vote for those in the G-O-P,
Unless you're a liberal,
In which case you'll giggle,
When someone votes for me."

-Rick Santorum

"Today I am hoping for drama,
For Repub's to be split by a comma,
I'd like everything free,
So that's why for me,
I am saving my vote for Obama!"

-Lazy, smelly hippies.

Limerick Tuesday is BACK!

You heard it right kids, the greatest day ever is coming back! Tell your friends, tell your kids, tell Jesus, tell everyone! Tomorrow will be the come-back of the day that will make your week that much better.
How it works: Post only in limerick form. (AABBA) Whether it be on Facebook or a blog or a memo to your employees, or in the comment section below the Offical Tuesday Awesome Limerick! It will make life that much more awesome and morale will be boosted by no less than 217% or your money back! Guaranteed! If you don't believe me, ask this little girl who I just told about Limerick Tuesday: